Who doesn't love a party? Specifically one celebrating you?
As a workshop leader, coach, and former teacher, I have found that the path to a sucessful outcome with any of my clients or students is filled with Mini celebrations.
I bet you're asking yourself, what exactly is a mini celebration?
A mini celebration is any moment in which you catch something positive has just occurred, no matter how small, and you praise it.
A student listened to a full sentence I said when they usually check out every other word. Mini celebration!
A client took a deep breath instead of reacting negatively to their child's comment. Mini celebration!
A student was courageous and shared an example of when they chose a negative action. Mini celebration! You get the idea?
Why is this powerful?
1. All children want to feel love and acceptance. Letting kids know we noticed something positive they did, sparks their desire to feel more of those good feelings, inspiring them to create more positive outcomes. (We can put ourselves in this category for this topic by the way too)
2. What you believe is what you see. When you get yourself in the habit of looking for the good and celebrating it, those good feelings you feel will cause you to seek out more positivity, and because expectation births realization, if you stick to it, soon you will notice the relationship with your child will become happier and more enjoyable as you are on this journey of mini celebrations.
How to throw a mini celebration
Look for any sign that your child did or said something positive, remember no action is too small, or can be taken for granted, if it's positive, it may deserve a celebration!
Think about what that action shows you about your child, are they expressing responsibility? Independence? Care? Creativity? Curiosity? Open mindedness?
Share your observation with excitement.
Tips for mini celebrations
Focus on mentioning the action and what characteristic this displays. For example: Wow, it was very responsible of you to take the trash out, way to go!
Avoid physical rewards. The goal is to celebrate the action and connect to the positive feelings connected to making that action, this increases intrinsic motivation.
Persevere. Often we're not used to giving our kids praise, and they may not be used to getting it, if at first try it seems weird to the both of you, try and try again.
Mini celebrations are a fun way to connect you to your kids, students, and even other family members, and encourages them to express the greatness you know they have within.
Celebrating your potential celebrations!